Six Years...

Six long years.

Today marks the anniversary of when I started at the company I'm at. I've managed to move up to the highest position, right under the boss. Manage the office and supervise the employees.

I should be thrilled. Six years is a big achievement in this non-committal world we live in. Jobs, marriage, children, church - these things seemed to be put on the back burner.

But, this is how I'm feeling right now.

If you're looking for a good post, don't read any further. It goes downhill from here.

Cry is what I'd rather do. I am overworked and underpaid. That is a no brainer. I sit at a desk 40 hours a week and my creative mind is about to go nuts.

About 4 years ago, I was ready to make a change. I prayed about it and felt the "go ahead". But, fear got ahold of me and I decided to just hang on for a little while longer... six years later I regret not trusting my decision and God's "ok".

So, now I'm waiting on God again, to help me make a big decision. A big scary one.

This is not a great post but I needed to vent.



-frazzled mess-

I woke up this morning frazzled, not quite all there and had to stop for something strong enough for me to wake up. After leaving Star*bucks I remember I'm the one opening up the office today... nice. Walk in, everyone's in the hall waiting. Not a good way to start my day. So I put on some music, sipped my Caramel Machiatto and tried to forget the morning disaster.

In preperation for this weekends baby party - I'm making something like this tonight... fingers crossed that it comes out looking like this and not like a five year old craft project. I have no backup.

" just can't do it" and other work related stuff.

Okay... so I tried to take a nice long break, since I was doing that unintentionally anyways, but I'm having blog withdrawals. :/

I've been blogging for too long to say goodbye now and my other blog for my photography is not up yet and I'm not sure when it will be, so I MUST post something here.

So Goodbye is still pending. :-)

::

Today is a big milestone for me... well yesterday was, but officially celebrating today. I have been with my company for 5 (long long long) years. 5 years! Me, the fickle person who can't decide on anything, has kept with something for 5 years. 5 days a week I've seen the same people (well same handful of people). Of course my job has changed and my check has gotten bigger, but I feel like I've been doing the same thing.

First off, let me say, I love my job atmosphere. I really do. The people are good to work with and I've been blessed beyond measure with good boss'.

I just wish, every day, that I could go back to being self employed. Once you have a taste of the freedom of 'bossing' yourself around, nothing quite matches up.

I can honestly say that I don't want to be here another 5 years. If God so wills, I pray that I am full fledged, knee dip in photography by this time next year. I can only hope.

So happy 5 year anniversary to me. God's truly been good to me.

::

Now to my second job/hobby. Photography.

Who would have thought that I'd get so into this? Not me. I.absolutely.love. taking pictures. Especially of people.

I've learned so much over the past couple of weeks and I can't wait to share some of the sessions I've done recently. I'm booked through Christmas! (little girly squeal)

Here's a little sneak peak:

Sigh! This girl is happy.

Deb

Good Changes

I've got good news to share! But first... here is the back story.

I've been wringing my hands with decisons concerning my job for... well... 2 years. I am a total chicken when it comes to asking for things from my boss. I just never know how he will react. I will be with this company for five years come November.

When I first started working with this family owned business, I was hired after my sister recommended me for the position of receptionist/clerk. I was twenty-one and very wet behind the ears. Not sure how to do much of anything in the office world since I had only worked for myself previously, owning a small business when I was nineteen. I thought I was a pretty good boss and didn't demand too much of myself. ;)

In the office, it was just me and my sister and the husband and wife boss team with a couple guys that were in and out. We had tons of benefits that come with small business; good relationships with our employers and we got to spend time together. Okay, so that wasn't always the best part since having your baby sister underfoot all the time was not easy and for me, having the big sister overhead all the time was not a thrill. But, we really enjoyed those days when we would eat lunch together in my sister's office and chat about nothing of importance.

As the months went on, the business began booming and we hired a receptionist. Things picked up more and more and now we have four girls in office besides me and several guys in and out of the office. All over the course of 4 1/2 years. Seriously, only due to the blessings of God. I am 100% sure of it.

Our office is split into three departments. My boss' handle one each and I handle the other. My department is 50% of the business and it's overflowing with work right now. God? I think so.

Anyway, I finally got up the nerve to discuss a much needed raise, and it was granted. Come to find out, my boss was already working on getting me one... God was already on the move while I was fretting over it.

Good changes!!!

MIB - Missing in blogland

I've been MIA or MIB for a few days... Work is beyond busy and once I'm done at work I just wanna crash at home.

I have so much to blog about, but will leave you with this. If you are feeling like a new blog look, go to the Design Girls blog for a chance to win one of her pre-made templates.

I'll be back to actually blog... maybe tomorrow!

It's Monday

I started off this beautiful day by slipping on mud and landing my sandaled foot in the gutter. Dirty brown water and who knows what else. Monday's are not a fun day for me. I think that's a consensus among all working women and men.

I am sitting in my office at work, trying to get motivated for the week... trying is the key word here. I don't think I've ever shared pictures of this place where I spend most of my "awake" time. Completely raw, no cleaning up, it can get a little messy. I've been with this company for almost 5 years and in this office for over a year and I still have not decorated it properly. I have so many plans, at least to throw some pictures on the wall, but it hasn't happened yet. So my walls are a light beige with nothing but a cork board and whiteboard. Bare and bland which is not me, or so I like to think.

I handle records for legal trials for major companies that everyone in the world knows. So we have a ton of work since everyone wants to sue them. Serious work overload. As you can see by the mess of papers all over the office. I have 10 in-boxes. T-E-N. Why ten? I have to separate everything from important to least important. It really makes no difference because it all because important to whoever is waiting for it. So now you know what I see every.single.day. Now that I've seen these pictures on here, I MUST work on getting this place looking more "comfy" (for lack of a better word). Any ideas?

:: :: :: ::

This last weekend was packed with wonderful goodness. I will post pictures in the next few days of hilarious kids program (2-5 year olds singing and dancing - stomachache laughter) and my nephews b-day party.

We visited my Gramps grave yesterday, Our first Father's Day without him. We also saw Nicole Brown* Sim*pson's* grave which is a few feet from my Gramps. You'll know her from the famous OJ* Simpson* trial.

We celebrated my dad by having a bbq and I bought him a gift which was NOT a gag gift but apparently everyone seemed to think it was. What do you get someone who has everything? A cushioned toilet seat cover. Why not? I figure you spend some time on there, especially as you get older and the comfier the better. He didn't think so.

My dad is an incredible Dad, even if he didn't like the gift I bought. Things have not always been perfect between us because I'm more of a Mama's girl and my sister is the Daddy's girl, but my Dad is wonderful. Growing up he was the BEST dad there was. He took us on a big vacation every summer, lavish spending on his kids that most people never get to experience. He exposed us to the finer things in life that his own mom and dad exposed him too. But beyond all that, he's always provided and loved us every single day. I knew that I can go to him if I needed help, which in my early adulthood days I really was a thorn in his side. I had a special place for Nord*strom and other stores that he didn't appreciate very much! ha! Which he never really knew where I spending all my hard earned cash, he just knew that I needed help with this or that. Eventually I grew up and realized that Dad couldn't always come to my rescue. I'm sure he's thankful for that! So, one day late, Thank you, Dad for being a great father! I love you.

Goodbye...

Goodbye May
Can it really be June 1st? Where did May go? So much happened in May. Life changing things. Some hard and some easy.

Goodbye Desk
I had my yard sale on Saturday and it was not a good turn out. The weather was not good, gold and cloudy, very odd. Packing up all that "junk" was depressing. But I did sell the one thing that I really wanted gone, my desk. It was a good purchase a few years back but now I just see a big bulky ultra modern piece that is not me. Good riddance to it.

Goodbye Scot
On Friday I came into the office and was shocked and devastated to find out that a co-worker passed away that morning. I worked very closely with him for the last 4 years and still can't comprehend that he's not here anymore. Things are a little quiet in the office. No one knows what will happen this week or how to fill the gap. I, like everyone else I'm sure, wait to here him walk in... Goodbye Scot.

A month like this requires some serious leaning on God. His strength is perfect and unwavering. Who am I that He would be mindful of me, care for me and love me?

Freaky Bunny Cake

My co-worker is taking a cake decorating class and he brings in the birthday cakes. He decided to bring one in today to celebrate Easter. What can go wrong with an Easter Bunny cake? EVERYTHING.

I present to you the Angry Easter Bunny from India who apparently is a smoker.

MEN - Sometimes we CAN live without them

"Men can't live with them and can't live without them" - Who came up with this saying??

There is something so appealing to the eye as walking by the men's bathroom while it.is.in.use. I know this because the door is open... not just the outside door but the stall door. HELLO!

::::

"To the men who use this facility..."

"From the women who have to walk past!"

Things to do while you're bored... at work

Slow. Slow. Slow.

That does not describe how things are at work. Work is almost non-existent. I come in, do the couple of things that I need to - prepare a couple of files of legal records, go through emails, pacify angry attorneys and inpatient paralegals... done.

I sit here, staring at the screen. Nothing to do at work or even to play with. So what is a working girl to do... according to the Internet, these are the top things.

1. Blink wildly and then close your eyes really tight for an interesting light show

(Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes)See a variety of blobs, stars and flashes. Try to make out shapes and see if your subconscious is trying to send you a message

2. Make up you're on office aerobics equipment with rubber bands... (I did this! lol)

(Amusement Potential: 10-15 minutes) keeps you going until you're a little sweaty and can't stand your own stench and still waiting for the clock to turn 5.

3. Try to not think about penguins

(Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes)This is especially hard, because by trying too much, you remember what you were trying to avoid thinking of. If you try too little, you end up thinking about penguins anyway.

4. Scratch yourself

(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)Go ahead, scratch yourself now. Even if nothing itches, go ahead. Doesn't that feel pretty good?

5. Make a low buzzing noise

(Amusement Potential: 15-30 minutes)Hours of fun in libraries! Keeping a totally straight face and looking nonchalant, make a low pitch humming/buzzing noise and see who reacts.


In the middle of blinking, playing with rubber bands, penguins, scratching and buzzing - I am THANKFUL that my job is secure even though it so BORING right now.

Starbucks is the BOMB

There just something about a good, hot eggnog latte on a chilly morning.

My sweet sister surprised my SIL and I at work with Starbucks. Mm-Mm GOOOD.

It's about 55 degrees here and I am freezing. This girl is not cut out for cold weather!

October's Rush

October is a busy month around here. Everything seems to be going and going and going... no time for a breather!

I'm working on Part 2 of my Disneyland trip. That will be up shortly. As for now, I had some random stuff to share.

::

I just finished Sweet Caroline by Rachel Hauck, the funniest book I've read. After about 3 weeks... I turned the last page. Like I said, no time to breathe let alone read! Sweet Caroline is a must buy, great message. I struggled with the ending, but I understand why the author chose to end it the way she did. Now, I am trying to get my hands on book #2, Love Starts with Elle. I'm told this will fill in the blanks.

::

I am in the middle of a costume frenzy... trying to figure out what to be for our Harvest Party on Friday night. The teachers are putting together a party for the kids and their family and friends. Horse rides, games, grilled corn, candy galore and all the other Halloween festivities. I was told by my sweet sister that maybe I should be a horse... not going to happen.

::

To get us in the Fall spirit, my co-worker gave me the below candy bag. After reading the label he put on, makes you think twice about eating it!

She's just so funny

My sweet, funny, crazy cousin Eileen is very close to me; more like a sister than a cousin. She is my oldest cousin and always, always has some funny story or incident to retell. As you can see from the above photo, which I hope I won't get killed for posting, there is never a dull moment.

I must share some things that happened this week that involve her. I am actually sitting at my desk at this moment, laughing so hard that my stomach hurts and I believe the girls outside my office may think I've gone crazy.

This morning she forwarded an email that she sent to the marketing team for the high profile company that she works for. She made an error on a form and said, "Sorry for the incontinence or confusion." In other words, she was saying, "Sorry for the bodily excretion disorder or confusion".

Earlier this week, she was telling a story about her mother dealing with her phone service. My aunt is a no nonsense kind of woman. She'll tell you what she thinks, no holding back... but she was unsure on this call.

She was on the phone with a representative that wasn't being very helpful, my cousin was in the background telling her, "Mom, their phone service sucks!", My aunt continued trying to talk to the phone service, but was getting no where. "Mom, they suck!", my cousin repeated. My aunt then said in the mouthpiece, "Ma'am... ma'am...uh, my daughter says that you suck." Yes she did.

There have times that she tells a story that makes me laugh so hard, sometimes at her, sometimes with her. Ha ha ha! She's the wild child of the family, I refuse to believe that I am, and she always goes for the shock factor. She's worn two different shoes to the office, she's fallen in front of people and laughed like crazy, she's jumped out of closets in her birthday suit and one time, while practicing her Spanish as a teenager, she hollered after the Spanish pastor of our church, "Adios viejo!" - English Translation: "Goodbye old man!"

She takes the cake for the funniest person I know. I get myself ready whenever I hear, "Deb, I have something funny to tell you!", as she laughs hysterically.

My Brother The Bum

"Will work for food!"

Well, it's happened. I predicted that this this day would come here.

I told the story of my brother having to fetch gas after my dad forgot they needed gas. I also mentioned that I wouldn't be surprised if someone tried to hand him money considering the condition of his work clothes. Covered with urethane, rips and holes from the chemicals. When he's in his work clothes he actually looks a little like Smee from Peter Pan... without the high rise shirt.

It happened today!

My brother works for my dad and they carpool together. My dad had to rush to the hospital to be with my Gramps (another story for another post) and of course, my hypochondriac brother did not want to go.

My mom, sweet mom, offered to pick him up by the freeway so my dad wouldn't have to go out of his way.

Anyhoo, there's my brother, waiting by the side of a busy street, he sees my mom pull up in her luxurious car, known to us as the Black Widow.

Before he can head over, a couple pulls up next to him and pulls down their window. Out comes the woman's hand with some money.

My brother says, "Oh... no thank you."

She was confused, "Are you sure?"

"Yes." He quickly moves to get in my mom's car.

My brothers a bum... at least to be general public.

::

Update 7/03

Apparently today is April 1st and no one sent me the memo. I guess gullible is my middle name.

-Daily B-

Birthday Cake... For ME!

Today is my birthday, 25!

So far it's not the birthday that I thought it would be... lol. I had a physical this morning, ugh, and am having some computer issues, but it will get better!

I consider myself a creative person, but I can't think of an original way to celebrate myself here... so, I am going to let you all in on 25 things that make me happy!

1. Corn - odd? Yes, I know but I love it!


2. Spa Pedicures - I can't live without them


3. Jean Skirts - I can have a closet full and be happy


4. Cute High heels - they kill but they're so pretty! =/


5. Kids and Babies - as long as I can send them back


6. Fine Dining - Especially when good ol' Dad pays.


7. My siblings - they tend to drive me crazy but I love crazy


8. Making fun of people - okay this sounds cruel. I really am a compassionate tender hearted person... really I am. (maybe I shouldn't have revealed that... Oh well.)


9. Reading a good book - This is pretty much my favorite thing


10. Finishing a project - Once done I can talk about how good I did until I start to annoy people.


11. Taking Pictures - This is a favorite hobby of mine


12. Watching Gilmore Girls - *sigh* I love being in another world for an hour


13. Listening to good music


14. Browsing blogs


15. Blogging - when it's good news =)


16. Sitting by a river or creek


17. Wide open spaces


18. Shopping with gift cards - As long as it's not out of my pocket I'm good


19. Finding a good sale - (especially shoes!)


20. Holding a baby after they've just woken up


21. Clean spaces


22. Lazy spring day


23. Yellow Roses


24. Looking at pictures from days past


25. Hearing and feeling God - Now this really makes me happy!
    

-Daily B-

Is it here? Yes!

It's here! It's here!

I have been chained to my desk this past week. Covered in last minute request, five months of backed up work, and lots of paperwork. All this to spend a workless week in the beautiful land of... Lake Tahoe!

I can't wait. We leave this weekend and I am so excited. The drive up is long and tiring but beautiful.

We are returning to this spacious town home across from the lake, oh joy!
I can't wait.

::

My nephew spent the night with me last night. He almost two and is so hyper. I have never seen a kid this hyper. He is constantly jumping and chattering and making noises and he is interested in everything. To top it off he has a fear of nothing... well almost nothing. He does get scared of dark hallways and the little straw snakes that crawl when you drop your drink from the straw on them. lol.

Anyway, he's learning his colors and blue (bwoo) and purple (Pupal) are his favorite right now. He is also trying out sign language. Did I brag enough? Well to add to it, he is taking horse riding lessons and joining the gym! All before he turns two!

For his first sleep over he did great. I'll share some pictures of my boy angel when I get back.

I'm off to a beautiful sun, pine, and tourist city. I'll see you, my friends, next week.

-Daily B-

Wiped Out

Have you noticed that I have changed my blog format... four times since Thursday? *CRINGE* I have. Every time I come up with a design and think it's interesting I get skeptical a few minutes later, few hours later, few days later. I must make a change!

I decided to use a free template. Good idea? No! It looks good but it wiped me out. Everything that has been on my page for... months and months is now erased. Floating around in blog land. Evil Blog land. Argh.

I can't guarantee that my need for change has been fed. I may change this page again and wipe out my wonderful widgets and format, wonderful to me. I may complain all over again. I can't help myself.

Now I sit here, trying to remember what was on my blog... what did I fill it up with? What was so wonderful? Probably nothing worth searching for again. lol.

I am now having deja vu... I think I complained about my layout in December... I can now guarantee that this will not be the last you hear of it!

Petty, petty, petty - that's what this post is.

I fooorgot!

Memory loss has been the topic of the day in my family. My father has recently found out that he doesn't pay attention very well. We all were in on the secret, he wasn't and now he is.

He recently noticed that he doesn't remember things very well and has marked this up to being a side effect of a new medication... I think he's the same just more aware that he doesn't pay attention.

This morning I noticed my mother around the kitchen puttering around. She seemed to be waiting on something. That's when I remembered, Dad was still asleep. We had been giggling earlier about Dad's "memory loss".

"Mom, Dad still asleep?"

"Yes.. he must be tired."

"Maybe he forgot to wake up?"

We laughed and laughed and I had to tell everyone that came by about my clever joke.

::

I received a call later on at work from my brother...

"Guess what happened to us this morning?" (he carpools with my Dad)

"What?"

"I told Dad yesterday that he was on empty."

"Oh no..."

"I told him again this morning, 'Dad you need to get gas'. Dad looks over and says, 'uh we're out of gas'."

My brother had to walk two blocks to get gas... in his work clothes. These aren't just any work clothes. It looks like he stole these off a homeless persons back. His clothes are so bad that my sister-in-law said, "wouldn't it be funny if someone tried to give him money?"

My Dad's lack of memory is starting to become a joke instigator... Should I be laughing? Yes! This is pay back for not paying attention for the last... 25 years. Now he can't even pay attention to himself.

Dad, If your reading this... hopefully you won't remember by the time I see you.

Picture This... California Sunset

En route home after work one day, several weeks ago, This is what I saw on the freeway. Not your normal picture of a "California Sunset" with coastal views and sandy beaches as shown on tourist ads. Even looking at it now I am in awe. Who created this painting in the sky? Did He have me in mind that day, knowing that it would make me view Him in a different way?

As I look at this I am reminded of how great God is. Everything created is unique. Each Sunset. Each Sunrise. Created by His hand. Beautiful.

I've got a Dummy

Ack! Can you imagine my surprise when this came in the mail this week!

I take care of records for legal trials, such as car accidents, amusement park accidents, large company employment issues (most names you would recognize, but I'll refrain from giving them bad publicity, lol). Paper and photos. That's the extent of my load. Never have I seen this before. This face is sitting on my credenza, staring at me. Inviting me to try it on... did I just write that? Try it on? Who knows where that dummy has been! He looks like he's been around.

Anyway, I have a Dummy, at least for a short while. He has really good skin, no brain, and he never says a word. I can say whatever I want in front of him and he will never say a word. Ever. So easy going. Never leaves. I think He deserves a name... How about Bill? Then I can sing "Hey Bill". Or, Colin Firth. Yes! That's the name I'll give him. Collie for short.

My Dummy Collie.

Man, I wish all men were like this!